July 15, 2008

12 Signs of Workaholism

I think the Guildhall has slowly (or not so slowly) turned me into a workaholic. I've been staying late at work often without any real reason, and after talking to one of the artists about it, I've generally decided it is a bad thing, or at least and unhealthy thing. I think it stems from a number of different things like a desire to sort of prove myself for my own benefit and also to impress Gearbox as much as I can in this short time period. Perhaps more specifically, however, I think it stems from the fact that the Guildhall has somehow broken my mind and I have a lot of difficulty disconnecting from work and enjoying free time. I think for overall quality of life considerations this is definitely something I need to work on, but it is not something I want to cultivate too much as the dreaded return to the Guildhall is not that far off.

It seems that this feeling of dread, while present in all the interns, seems largely restricted to the designers. I mean, we all work really hard, and I by no means intend to take anything away from the other disciplines, but as far as C9 is concerned, I think we've gotten the worst of it. Whether that is due to the curriculum itself, our ridiculous attrition rate, or perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy of bitterness, the LDs are typically the burnt out members of the cohort. It feels like we've been repeatedly tested and put through the fire, and we've proved that we definitely can take it, but that still doesn't make it let up. Ultimately, what I can say is I can't imagine being better prepared for the job. The Guildhall has given me a very good idea about what the job is, the skills to do it, and the confidence to excel at it, and that's pretty powerful. It has come at a price, sometimes a hefty one, but I think after I am finally out and a little time has passed, I can see it being all worth it.

All that being said, I am making a concentrated effort to try and get back to a normal life for the next few weeks. Leaving work at a reasonable hour, using my free time as I see fit (though there are sadly GH things that need doing before next term), trying to find a good work/life balance, all that good stuff. Work today consisted of more brainstorming, discussing, and meetings with the leads. We are closing in on what it is exactly that we want to do, and we are getting ready to move into the next phase of the design process. It's nice to have a lot of time to think about exactly what we want to do, but the brainstorming can be oddly tiring at times, especially when designers don't really agree on things. Anyway, the job is still cool and enjoyable and I think our feedback from the leads has generally been positive so that's good. Alright, I should get to bed, later all!

No comments:

Post a Comment